AB Mick and Kay's Blog

2. “Your” and “You’re”

This is my second biggest pet peeve with basic grammar/spelling (I am aware that this is other people’s #1 – looking at you Ollie). This is probably the most prevalent. My reason for having then/than as my #1 is because I deal in constructing and evaluating arguments all day, every day, and “then” is a central word to nearly any argument. However, “your”/”you’re” is a very close second. I suspect that one of the causes is that people who don’t write often (or don’t take the little time and attention it takes to spell properly…and especially those who rely too heavily on spellcheck/grammarcheck) usually spell the way that words sound to them (generally a terrible idea in English!) and people say “your” and “you’re” exactly the same in many circumstances. Personally, I make sure to have a distinction in how I say “your” and “you’re.” For example, I say “your” like “yohr” and “you’re” like “yoor.” Although it is certainly not strictly incorrect to pronounce “you’re” like “yohr,” I like to make it easier on the hearer to distinguish them in my speech acts. Maybe it’s an unconscious attempt to get people to hear the difference so that they’ll write the difference!

2.1 “Your”

So, we use “your” to represent possession. It isn’t necessarily a specific person’s position, as in the possessive case of “you.” For example,

I took your coat.

And,

If you want to go skydiving, then your best option is to use a plane.

In the former case, I’m clearly referencing a specific person that I’m speaking to. In the second, I’m merely making a general conditional reference that could apply to anyone, even myself. So, the first is the possessive case of “you” whereas the latter is still possessive in terms of “best option” is possessed by whoever “your” refers to, but in the latter case the “your” need not refer to someone in particular and specifically not necessarily the person to which I’m speaking.

2.2 “You’re”

A contraction is when we combine two words and then drop one (or more) and insert an apostrophe ( ‘ ). “You’re” is the contraction of “you” and “are”. We drop the “a” from “are” and replace it with an apostrophe to create the contraction “you’re”. In every case that “you’re” is used, one could always replace “you’re” with “you are.” This is the ONLY use for the word!

Incorrect: Your not using the word “you’re” correctly!

Correct: You’re not using the word “you’re” correctly!

You’re going to get your car today, right?

Notice that I used both cases in the same sentence. Since “you’re” is a contraction, I could have just as easily written “You are going to get your car today, right?” with the exact same meaning.

3. “It’s” and “Its”

This is another pretty prevalent and inexcusable mistake. However, it is much less intuitive for people since it’s rather rare that everyday people come across “its” very often. However, it definitely isn’t a rare event; again, the words sound identical so people probably don’t notice when someone is speaking “it’s” or “its.” Furthermore, people may not know the rules of language so that they don’t notice it even when it’s written.

3.1 “It’s”

“It’s” is just like “you’re”: it is a contraction of “it” and “is” where we drop the “i” of “is” and replace it with an apostrophe. Alternatively, it can be the contraction of “it” and “has” where we drop the “ha” of “has” and replace it with an apostrophe.

I think that it’s going to rain today. (It is)

I think that it’s been a long time since we had rain. (It has)

I think that it’s going to be a long time since it’s rained. (It is, It has)

Some people are confused when they see (‘s) since adding an apostrophe and an “s” is how we show possession in English. For example, France’s capital is Paris. To show that France possesses as its capital Paris, we add an apostrophe and an “s” to the end of the subject, France. But, this is NOT the case for “it’s”. It is not correct to use “it’s” to show possession for the subject “it.”

Incorrect: The bird over there is a Blue Jay. It’s mother died last winter.

Correct: The bird over there is a Blue Jay. Its mother died last winter.

3.2 “Its”

THIS is the possessive form of “it”!

In the previous section I used “its” when discussing the France/Paris example. When I wrote that France has as its capital Paris, I used “its” as the possessive form of “it”.

Correct: The cat isn’t happy today since its friend is away.

Incorrect: The cat isn’t happy today since it’s friend is away.

Notice that in the latter case we could not replace “it’s” with “it is” and retain meaning. “The cat isn’t happy today since it is friend is away” makes no sense.

Good luck,

Mick

On Tues and Wed I cleaned my house (did a fine job of it, IMO). Went to pick up Kay for 4pm (her flight was a little bit delayed). I had gotten my car fixed on Tues because it was dripping oil like a sieve (turns out it was a problem w/ the oil filter). Fortunately, the car did just fine on the trip to/from the airport (about 125km or so each way). Traffic was fine heading in but I knew that we’d hit rush hour on the way home.

I met her at the baggage claim w/ flowers (lilies). We hugged and said “hi.” Got her bag and drove home. Predictably, we hit rush hour so the 1hr trip took just under 2. We talked most of the way. We got home, dropped off her bags, and took my very impatient dog for a walk (he had been in his cage for 4hrs or so). Then, we ordered pizza for dinner (I didn’t feel like cooking the planned meal: butter chicken…we’ll have that on Friday). We changed each other and I put her into her footies whereas I was put into my shortalls. Then we settled onto the couch and cuddled watching tv and playing a big of Halo ODST. We changed each other a few hours later and I got into my footies and we went to bed shortly after.

We slept in really late for when we went to bed, but it was great. I had to go to school for ~5hrs and she hung out at home. After I got home we changed each other and eventually went grocery shopping for the week. I’m switching back to being mostly vegetarian so I’ll be cooking a few of those meals (though we’ll still have butter chicken tomorrow as well as chicken strips/fries a couple days for lunch). So, we bought a bunch of vegetarian essentials including spices, lentils, sesame seeds, etc.. My other shipment of Bambino Classicos came today (yeah, that means that I have >100 bambinos at the moment), so that’s cool. I love that it only takes 2 days for them to get here (3 days from the time I order).

Tomorrow night we’re planning to go see Zombieland. I figure that most people will be lining up for Where the Wild Things Are and Zombieland won’t be busy . We’re going to go to Zombieland on a weekday (like Tuesday) since I won’t have anything to do then and it won’t be busy. I can’t wait to see both movies. If it were possible, I’d love to wear footies to Wild Things…but it’d wreck the feet to do that .

If the weather holds, I think that we may go to the Zoo on Monday…pics will follow! I’ve never been to that Zoo, and Toronto has a very good one…so I’m really looking forward to it!

Stay padded, Mick

First, an apology for not posting recently. I’ve been exceedingly busy; in fact, I was caught off guard by how busy I got. So…sorry! The good news is that Kay arrives today for 10 days and there will be a flurry of posts to come…it will have been worth the wait!

So, here is a post that I have been wanting to make for a long time on grammar, spelling, and usage. I’m a writer and editor so it’s obviously a topic of importance, but it’s much more than that: it really bothers me how poor people’s average levels of grammar/spelling/usage are. I can’t really speak to whether the state of affairs is deteriorating, though I like to think that it is. I really have no evidence either way. But, what I do know is that nearly no one in my cohort during high school (so, myself and my friends from other schools in the district) received much, if any, formal training in these topics. And yet, everyone is expected to write papers. Furthermore, not having this training is a real detriment when entering postsecondary education where a premium begins to be placed on writing skills. And yet, there are no widespread grammar offerings in university since they argue that it is the providence of the high schools to teach it. So, students don’t get it in high school and the universities refuse to teach it on principle, so students are caught in grammar purgatory, left to learn it on their own through trial and error, or not at all. Imagine the impact on grades for students’ papers by not missing out on grammar/usage marks; or the impact for learning how to properly construct sentences, paragraphs, arguments, and papers. Imagine!

As a disclaimer, most of what I know in this area is from a lot of proactive self study from books and guides as well as discussions with professors to always better my writing. I will make this into a series since it would be a VERY long single post.

1. My biggest pet peeve of all! “Then” vs “Than”

We use “then” when we’re constructing “if…then” statements. If it is an “if…then” statement, then we should always follow the “if” by an eventual “then.” The “if” introduces the antecedent and the “then” introduces the consequent.

If it rains tomorrow, then I will use an umbrella.

The statement indicates a logical implication of the antecedent on the consequent. This is also known as a “conditional” statement. Now, it has become somewhat common to leave out the “then” in a conditional statement and merely using a comma.

If it rains tomorrow, I will use an umbrella.

The “then” is implied and assumed to be there. However, it’s always best to be clear and to include the “then.” Doing so is best in almost all circumstances.

Edit: Finally, there is the temporal or sequential use of “then.” This use is to indicate that something follows in time or sequence.

I’m going to go home and then go for a run.

The “then” indicates that going for a run will follow my going home.

On the other hand, we use “than” to introduce relations.

John is bigger than Bill. This coffee is hotter than yesterday’s. I would rather write a paper than mark assignments.

All of these are indicating a relational measure between at least two things: bigger than, hotter than, would rather x than y.

This is frighteningly common and I take BIG marks off for this in assignments. There’s no excuse for it and spellcheck will NOT save you. Do not rely on spellcheck: you have to know what is correct for yourself since putting in a “than” when you should put a “then” will not show up. It may also not even show up with grammar check. So, you have been warned!

A sample of topics to look forward to:

You’re/Your

Their/There/They’re

It’s/Its

Principle/Principal

Who/Whom

Not ending sentences with prepositions

Punctuation!!

Being sure to include “that” where appropriate

Until next time (very soon!), ttfn!

Mick

I had planned a more substantial post, but this week has been extremely hectic. I had a bunch of things hit me at once that I wasn’t expecting to have to complete yet. But, I’ve done well and I’m happy. But, it means that today’s post comes a little late and isn’t what I was hoping it will be. Don’t worry! What I had intended to write will be up for Monday.

I made my first AB acquisition of Lego a month or so ago just from Superstore. It was pricey for just a basic starter box of Lego…gone are the good old days of youth when Lego was cheap! But, in preparation for Kay coming, I wanted to get more so I ordered a 500 piece lot from ebay and it arrived today. It was about $50 with shipping, but a far better rate than my first purchase. Next time, I’ll probably order one of those 10lb boxes with many thousands of pieces. Sitting on the floor, diapered, with a paci playing with Lego is REALLY relaxing and fun. I’m looking forward to playing with Lego with Kay.

Here’s a picture of what I made awhile ago when I got that first set of Lego.

Have a great weekend!

Mick

Early post tonight again.

Enjoy.

The first time I wore diapers to school was in grade 10 and I wore goodnights. Goodnights (and now UnderJams, though I think goodnights are better even though I don’t use them anymore) are as discreet as a diaper gets. The biggest concerns of people who want to try wearing diapers in a public setting are: noise and visibility (bulge, etc.).  We’re naturally a little paranoid and get too easily convinced that others can hear the slightest rustle of the plastic. But, let me assure you that it’s just not the case with most diapers, most especially the cloth-backed ones. First, people aren’t looking for the sound like you are. When you’re looking for a sound you can either begin to imagine it or be sufficiently well tuned to pick it up when no one else will (who isn’t looking for it). It’s mostly the latter that we’re concerned with: although you may hear the barely perceptible rustle, NO ONE ELSE can. They’re not expecting to hear the sound, so they probably won’t if it’s soft enough. Furthermore, even if they barely hear it, they won’t immediately attribute it to a diaper. Also, our clothes make sounds when we move so they may just attribute it to that.

There are certainly ways to minimize any sound, though. The first is to wear a onesie. This has two benefits. First, it acts as a tucked-in undershirt so that you won’t be exposed when you bend over. Second, it adds a layer to help contain the sound (thirdly, it will hold up wet diapers and keep them from sagging).The second thing you can do is wear something like boxer-briefs over top. They’ll be form fitting so they’ll compress some of the bulge and definitely dampen any noise. These are better than boxers because they’re tighter to the skin (which is paramount in noise reduction) and better than underwear because they’ll cover the whole diaper without making it too tight (a poorly fitting diaper leads to poor absorption and…LEAKS!). Finally, pick clothes that make a little noise themselves like jeans.

Finally, remember that this advice is mostly meant for situations where you’ll be in close quarters with people in quiet surroundings. If you’re outside, then people flat out won’t hear a cloth-backed diaper anyway…it’s just too quiet. They may hear something like a bambino, but if you go through these same steps, then there’s no chance .

The second issue is the bulge. With discreet diapers like pull-up style (goodnights, etc.) or fitted briefs like Tena Ultra, there is almost no noticeable difference even with tight fitting clothes. Again, while you may notice a very small difference (which the paranoia takes as obvious), no one else will. First, they don’t immediately know the before/after view that you’re comparing how your clothes fit while wearing vs not wearing. Second, again, they’re not looking for oddly shaped butts. Third, they won’t immediately assume that even a slight butt bulge is a diaper. Rather, they’ll first attribute it to just the way the clothes hang on you. Believe me, with discreet diapers, no one can tell about the bulge.

Most of the ways to deal with sound double for dealing with any bulge. The big difference is to choose pants that are 1-2 sizes too big. My choice is 1 size too big because anything bigger doesn’t look right (anything bigger looks like it’s too big). Belts are obviously important .

When I’m going to school, I wear a Tena Ultra (with a couple extra in the bag) with a onesie (and a polo or button shirt over, and maybe a sweat shirt in the winter) and sometimes boxerbriefs…and then jeans or board shorts. I’m also an AB/DL and not incontinent so I care a tonne about people not finding out (though I do have overactive bladder and would just say that I need them…half truth). But, if I were incontinent I would still take measures for concealment, but I would be far less concerned with being discovered. If I were incontinent then a Tena Ultra would be insufficient and I’d most definitely be sporting the bambino. They’re thinner than the Abena XPlus, just as absorbent, and smell better, in my opinion.

Obviously, my final advice is to take extras if you intend to wet enough to even come close to risking leaks. Know the capacity of your diaper from trials at home. Know how wetting them in different positions (sitting, standing, reclining, etc.) will affect absorption. Then, make sure that you don’t come too close to risking a leak since that is truly embarrassing.

Go give it a try if you’ve been hesitant. Start by just going to the mall or the grocery store. You’ll probably be shocked at how you were so paranoid beforehand. Then, you’ll love it that you can wear them wherever you want .

Good  luck,

Mick

I’m strangely tired ALL day today, so here’s an early post so I can go to bed early .

In southern Ontario Fall arrived rather abruptly pretty much the day after the equinox. We didn’t even get very much of a summer. My parents were out from the West coast for a few weeks in July and it was mostly cloudy and I don’t think any of the days got above 30C (except 1 out of 3 weeks!). We got a LOT of rain this summer. I’d say that out of the whole summer we had maybe 2 non-consecutive weeks about 6 weeks apart where it was consistently above 30C and sunny. Oh well!

Anyway, as soon as mid-late September rolled around, we went from mid to high 20s to the teens almost overnight! Tomorrow’s high is only supposed to be 10 and Friday’s low will be -1! I had to put the heat on this morning for the first time since maybe April. The thing is, although I bemoan the loss of summer (what summer we had, anyway), I really enjoy the cooler weather. I get to wear my footies all the time (when it’s summer, I find it too hot to be in them) and it’s more comfortable being diapered outside. I also love the winter and snow, so I’m looking forward to that (last year we got a lot…and it snowed often). My dog is a lot happier now, though. I take him for runs on my skates and since the temperatures have cooled off he’s pulling a lot harder and longer (which is great!). There’s a significant hill by my house that he tried pulling me up for the very first time today (usually he’s beside or behind me by the time we get to the hill).

Apparently there’s already snow in the forecast for where Kay lives!!

Stay padded,

Mick

Cloth Diapers

I have 6 cloth diapers. I have 2 night and 2 day ones that have to be pinned on.  I also have a pull up style and a Velcro one which are all from Babykins

Disposable diapers

For disposable diapers I only have tried Molicare, Abena X-plus air-flow  and goodnights out of those I like molicare because of the absorption BUT I like the Abena x-pluses for their thickness but I will NEVER order their Air-flow ones again: you wet them once and it goes through the fabric after awhile and gets your onesie wet a little… no fun!

I have bambinos waiting for me at Babymick’s. I can’t wait to try them.  There are also ABU nights going there and the ABU dry kids ones too. I also ordered some ABU nights to come here too because I’m running low L

Onesies

I have 1 pink and 1 blue one with bears on them from babkins. I havet 2 summer ones that are blue, to wear out in public once I go to babymick’s place, and I’ve got another pink one on its way from CosyNDry.

Teddies/Plushies

I’ve got 4 tigers, 1 fox, 2 bears, 1 puma, 1 BIG yellow Elephant, 1 dino, and 1 leopard teddy . One of the tigers I made in a class that I had in grade 6. He’s my Teddy: I sleep every night with him and when I leave home for a few days I take him with me……when my mom’s not looking hehehe

Pacis

I have a cookie monster and an elmo one. I wish I had a tigger one But they’re all Nuk 5, so I can’t complain too much I got them from pacifiersrus.

Bottles

I had 2 bottles that needed liners. But,  I don’t know where they are….I think I threw them out when I had to go away for work. But I got an Easyflow (BornFree). It’s a glass one and it’s perfect <3. I also have 2 sippy cups that are Orange and purple. I am also going to have one from CosyNDry bottle with pooh bear on it and the AB sized nipple on it .

Colouring

I’ve  got like 4 different colouring books and I print some pictures off the net to colour…I can never keep to one book. I like to have options when I colour. Lol

Hugs,

Kay

It’s hard being an AB when you live with your parents. It’s hard but I manage to survive it. When I order more diapers, and it comes in the mail, if my mom asks what it is, I say “stuff” and she doesn’t even ask again. Usually, I’m already down the stairs before she can ask again LOL. My mail has to be picked up in town at the post office because I live out on acreage. Also, I don’t have a driver’s license (yet! I’m working on that) so my mom actually picks it up for me. If she asked again, I could just say that it’s clothes or a blanket or something.

Anyways, I put them away right away and later I cut the box up so she doesn’t ask me again what was in the box when I take the garbage/recycling out. I order band T-shirts or W.o.W. T.C. once in awhile so she sees new things and doesn’t get suspicious. If you keep saying that you’re getting clothes, you need to at least have something to show for it .

I’ve almost been caught once when I had to wash my cloth diapers once when she was home. I threw them into the washer and I forgot about them and she had to do laundry too, so she switched them around. Once I realized she did I started to PANIC so I stayed cool once they were dry I got my stuff and my cloths out of the dryer she asked me where the blankets came from I said “I found them in my room and they were stale so I washed them” PHEWF!!!! Man I thought I was going to drop a heavy load right there LOL. She has been downstairs a few times but nothing I can’t handle. I put my stuff away before I leave my room and when I want my paci with me during the day I wear a REALLY baggy T-shirt and I clip it on the inside just in case she comes into the office or something. Then, I spit it out under my shirt and when I get up I don’t have to worry because it clipped inside my shirt

I’m not too brave when it comes to wearing diapers around the house (yet). For the most part I stick to wearing in my room or when no one’s home.

Hugs,

Kay

Whenever there’s a strong wind storm, Kay often loses internet for a day or two. Unfortunately, she has the next two posts to come and lost it about 5 minutes before she was going to send them to me! That was yesterday, so we expect it to be up again tomorrow…in which case there will be a post tomorrow. If not, there will be one Monday night and then TWO whenever she gets her stuff to me

Let’s cross our fingers for her getting internet back ASAP

Mick

Now that the content has gotten off to a good start, the schedule for our posts will be every weekday (5/week) sometime in the evening before. So, Monday’s post will come late Sunday night, etc..

Mick and Kay